


Safety of the night

by grainipiot



Series: Kinktober test [12]
Category: League of Legends
Genre: Anal Fingering, Edgeplay, Established Relationship, Frottage, Kinktober 2019, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, maybe fluffy if you squint hard enough, they still like each other a lot lot lot, tho times are difficult
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2021-01-02 17:21:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21165317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grainipiot/pseuds/grainipiot
Summary: Difficult to forget and move on, especially when they kept seeking each other. It always came back to this, nightly visits.Kinktober prompt for 'edgeplay' and 'fingering'





	Safety of the night

**Author's Note:**

> Yo!  
Sorry for that ooooooooooone, I wanted to give but idk if it makes really sense
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading <3

_We shouldn’t._

At least that was what Shen repeated himself every time. How could they even pretend this ? Stupid question, he already knew the answer. Always so difficult to let go someone like him. Or to go away by himself. In the end, one caught the other or the contrary and the cycle started again.

And Zed would try, try, try. Push him a little more, see if it was still welcome. As if he asked. But he knew as well as Shen, his ‘visits’ would always be welcome. Take a little more, give as much, relish.

How many years ? He knew yet he tried to forget, just like this series of events that led them to this. The breaking point, blood spilled and soiled sanctuary. All this was past. But their embraces remained. How could he forget what had been ? Impossible. He had to carry on or it would destroy him from the inside. Move on, stay in control, keep the legacy alive. This was what master Kusho would have wanted. But what would he say on the latest events ? Would he frown on him for still allowing Zed ?

There was no real harm. The only thing he gave him was access to his own body, privacy. It wouldn’t hurt anyone, except Shen’s guilt. Maybe Zed knew that and did it on purpose, to bring him to feel, rebel against his neutrality. His mission.

This was also the reason blood poured that day, besides the refusal of deserved punishment for a sick murderer. To make him feel, even in the extreme. Zed succeeded. So much pain, for even trying to break him free. It hurt so much and even now Shen could feel it, echo.

Yet he let him come to him. Even as they were supposed to hate each other. Was love impossible to burry ? To be blamed on youth ? After years it still hurt but he hid it. Don’t show. Stay still. And Zed returned, the gods knew why. Well, he knew. At least he hoped it was the truth. They couldn’t without one another. Neither managed to let go since then.

So it led to these nights, shadows paying a visit once more.

Was it love that guided him ? Was it a pure sadistic urge to remind him ? Bring him to the breaking point ? They could pretend but it always burned. Shen still hoped it was merely a craving for closeness, something equally personal.

_We can’t_. Yet he still waited for these nights. Shiver of anticipation, if the shadows would come to find him again, keep him away from sleep.

It started like always. Red eyes gleaming in the dark, cold claws over him yet it never brought pain. Merely brushing his cheek to wake him up. As if he ever found some proper rest.

It happened a few times Zed took directly what he craved from him but something lingered in his move. Memories, of a younger time. Of eager hands and cheerful embraces. Of innocent happiness. All this was gone to dust but feelings remained.

Alive, while Zed hastily searched for his face, the first occasion to kiss. He let him do, still relieved to have him despite everything. Nothing left to hide, lips claimed once more. It could get biting, or languid, depending on the latter’s mood. This night, he felt the smirk after he came to hold Zed. Warm body on top of him, explored as his hands followed memories. It never got old.

No question, not anymore. It couldn’t get bad, he knew him at least for this. As cruel as he grew, there was still this special treatment for Shen. The kiss broke apart and without waiting Zed undressed him. So easy to do, since he was allowed. Shen let him do, still touched by the eagerness in gestures. He lied in his bed, prey to the shadows yet not once it hurt him. The damage was done years ago.

Instead, lips got busy around his face, kissing wherever he wished. This was purely to sate instincts, before he could go on his whims of the night.

When Shen tried to rise a little, at least to sit up and hold him in his arms, he was firmly pinned down. Then a sharp gaze, along the silent order. It gave the mood for this time.

« You’ll get what I give you. » Not too mean or merciless but it could still give a shudder.

Actually, Shen would be able to get out of it, if he really wanted to. But he didn’t, because what else could he do ? He still wanted these instants and managed to trust Zed. Even if most of nights he came to such a low level, it might scare him for good and convince him to stop. Yet Shen let himself be undressed, touched with that particular kind of silent love though it wouldn’t be acknowledged out loud. Zed would merely say this was his fun, his place to test. In gestures, it was far other question.

Because nothing could hide the reverence of now bare hands travelling his body, seeking a few reactions out of mere touch. Brush, seek, explore. Nothing new, all too known yet Zed never got enough.

It didn’t seem that this night he was here for the crude relief. When it was the case, he directly went to it, yanking clothing and doing the minimum of preparation. It was up to Shen to discover minute by minute what the latter came for. It changed almost every time. Hidden memory of that one night he had him specifically to cry his pleasure, take him bit by bit till there was nothing left. When it turned soft. He brushed it away, no need to dwell too long on rare occasions.

Naked under quick hands, he tried to rule his breathing. One of the first things to conceal, keep control. Seem unbothered. Zed knew this wouldn’t be enough, he would always find the right way to take him down.

Noises would be pouring freely if he wasn’t trying to stop this. Soft sounds, meant to stay silent. The latter stayed on top of him, sort of straddling him. Still the feeling of fabric, armor. Shen wished it was gone too but was he really able to request so much. _It would be nice_. Just one time, to be the one taking Zed. To show his own desperation in the implicit. To feel needed.

For now it was rather quiet, nothing too dangerous for his composure. Unless the latter decided to take this to a true worship, have his mouth everywhere. Yet bad idea to think about it, as soon Zed made a move down there. Last thing to cover him, gone. That hand came to his erection, even to grab him. As if pleasantly surprised to find him hard.

Indeed a low chuckle came, vibrating against his neck where Zed was providing his attention. Was it really unexpected ? The second Shen was shaken out of sleep his body would catch up, anticipating a future intercourse even when it wasn’t started. _Don’t talk_. A bit shameful to be found craving so much, despite himself.

« So you missed me that much ? » Parting just to say this, sweet tone on the edge.

Temptation, to speak or not. Not sure if it would have an impact on the rest of the night, if Zed would oblige or punish.

Instead he kept his gaze on the ceiling and merely exhaled, somehow tense under such attention.

« Won’t answer ? Alright. » Now a hint of threat, for he would do everything to catch his attention, make him react.

Shen braced himself just in case and indeed he had to, when that same hand took hold of his cock and stroked loosely. The bare minimum to be felt and needed yet not enough to provide proper relief. Wishing himself to stay calm, he focused on anything else, even though it wouldn’t work. Zed was far too stubborn to let him escape pleasure. What was the point of these visits, after all ? To make him scream his name, to be the only thing he could think of, to be felt.

It became difficult as Zed gave it more effort, now sucking a hickey with dedication. Leave his mark. After nearly too much, Shen couldn’t help but slightly shift under him, trembling. To hold on for so long was tiring, even for him. Completely covered by his lover’s body, not a patch of skin left and too reminded of the warm presence in contact. That hand trapped between them, semblance of relief yet playing at the limit.

Sort of huff nearby, proof that he was doing quite a good job at staying quiet for now. At least to Zed’s taste. And if he wasn’t getting soon enough what he seeked, then he shall move on and give more effort. Like actually starting. Shen didn’t know if he should fear for himself or be glad. His composure would lose in the end, the minimum he could do was take the pleasure provided.

To wait for the ineluctable was painful. It had to happen but it was impossible to know what Zed would do.

Then contact was partially lost, sort of cold air brushing his chest. To hold back that whimper almost failed, terrible reaction to the lack of touch.

In this quite dim room, Shen couldn’t see so clearly. Barely able to see figures so he focused on other senses. Zed was still here, having merely withdrew as to watch him. Planning, thinking. Typically the sort of instant control wasn’t a question, Shen could fight back, take him, whatever crossed his mind wince it was possible. Again, he didn’t. Just lying down, waiting. The shadows would always find him, in the end. Why try anything ? Innerly he wanted the following step, the relief to be given.

_What now ?_

Be sure not to question, things would just happen as soon. Again a hand trailed over his torso, feeling his breath picking up. Shudder under Zed’s palm, stark contrast of temperature to the chilly air around. Not even thinking, Shen arched into the touch as it went up. Possessive hand over his chest, lingering with obvious pride.

Eyes gleaming in the dark, he would never escape it.

All this stopped as fast as it started. Even bringing him to ask himself if that was an illusion, if he hallucinated this.

Zed said nothing, looming nearby. For once he was silent, not really pushing him to the limit merely with his words. It could hurt sometimes but hearing his voice showed that he wasn’t alone right then.

Faint noises. Shen grew worried, nothing was happening and he was left here. Open. Vulnerable. Greatly aroused in that curious context only them could understand.

Then his legs were spread firmly, to let Zed get comfortable there. This sight would be probably worth a lot, to see him in display, cock aching for attention. Another reason to anticipate, rush of blood.

Next move didn’t disappoint. Shock of cold, pressing in his most intimate place. _Ah_. Still that teasing mood or Zed would have already pushed a finger or two inside, going for an efficient preparation. Right then, it wasn’t the case. Just probbing, making himself known. Shen busied his hands in the sheets, to mask his crumbling control.

Panting, so difficult to keep this in. Just when he thought he could get used to it, Zed proved him wrong and slipped a finger inside him. Reaching deep, not much care for slowness. Also because he knew Shen, the limits of his body, points not to cross unless clearly seeking to hurt.

« Better ? » Sounding like a laugh, dark like the room. So far yet so close, like this hand exploring his walls with increasing interest.

Soon he would break, he knew it. Not that close to climax, by far but there was a limit to pleasure before it got voiced. Stubborness won.

Before that point came, Shen tried to hide it as he could in other reactions, less mortifying. Squirming into the stimulation, when one became two and Zed stretched him good. The tremor ran his body, delightful but he couldn’t allow himself.

Nothing more than this, eager hand spreading him open, so slick it glided in smoothly. His cock lied heavy against his pelvis, so hard it started to hurt not to receive anything there. Almost wished for more, Zed’s mouth. _Please_. As long as he kept himself from voicing this.

« Tell me, does it feel good ? Do you want more ? » Oh he would talk again, till he got was he wanted. A smile that could be heard.

His unbusy hand stayed over Shen’s thigh, idly stroking while he gave his full attention down there.

Now a third finger added, making the stretch worth it.

First moan left aloud, an accident. Also the beginning of troubles. This was the signal Zed was waiting all along. First clue that he wasn’t doing nothing, that it was felt. More than the restlessness under his palm, the shaky moves after each flick of a finger inside, it was the first vocal reaction. Now the door was open for anything else.

_No…_

This was getting too far, no doubt he was going to come before the actual fucking. A hand strongly held on his mouth, to prevent more noises. It was already done, he couldn’t go back. Merely able to breathe deeply, eyes shut close. Maddening pace, dragging him without ceremonies. Yet it wasn’t enough.

Why not take it himself, since he was condemned anyway ? No way he last after the first thrust, once Zed deemed this preparation enough.

So Shen went to stroke himself, unable to relax with that building tension within him. The second he touched himself, Zed slapped his hand away.

« No. My rules. »

« Please, I need… » Too weak for his own taste, he wasn’t supposed to let go like this. Yet here he was, slave to that deft hand.

« Oh ? But have you earned it ? » So low but in such silence, it echoed.

Very tempted to fight the order and still go for it himself. What Zed could do ? But he was already too deep into this, no way to fight back while keep his last semblance of control.

Precum trailed down his cock, a bit more after each thrust and scissoring in slick warmth. Shen’s body betrayed him, rocking back eagerly. It was already too long since all this started and he couldn’t go on forever. All resistances fell in a clatter.

« …gonna come soon… » Trying to convey his own desperation, how it burned in his veins like poison. Asking everything to make it stop.

Many moans broke out, tiny gasps when Zed grew rough on him. Quick pace, even going to a fourth finger and making him helpless. It held him at the limit, nothing to push him beyond. Whine despite his inhibitions, his now lost control. All this could be damned, he needed this.

If it was possible, it seemed that the latter made sure to avoid this spot inside him. Going for everything but this, stretching him wide but nothing as sweet as the electric feeling if he ever made an effort.

Just when Shen thought it would be enough, he was held back. Hand squeezing hard his cock, keeping him from climax.

« Zed— ! L-let me… »

So so unfair, to have barely no way by himself to find pleasure and even when it was in reach, Zed refused it.

Shaking, back arching off the bed till the first rush calmed down. Only to leave him craving more than ever, frustrated to be kept like this. Limp in the sheets, harsh breath and at the limit of begging

Punishing grasp around his cock that didn’t go even once this false peak went. A real mess, leaking yet no relief given.

Then at last Zed obliged, brushing his prostate. Once, twice, then again and again. Violent shudder wrecking through him. All while stopping him from coming. Despicable.

« Not yet. A little longer. »

Was it him or Zed’s tone turned softer ? Not too much but certainly hinted, now that he got what he craved. Shen, coming undone just by his hand.

Why clung to control now that it was useless ? Gone for good, no way back.

Once more pressure increased, begging to be released. It built up, impossible to bear. Yet Zed never faltered, hard pace inside while he made him wait. Little by little, till he could fall again and repeat the process.

Shen couldn’t control himself, bucking urgently, jerking into contact. Faster, as tension went.

« please please please… » What even was the point of all this ? Reason was gone along his composure and control. Leaving just the man, with all it meant in needs and longing.

Head turned to a side, a sob came out. Not even muffled. So much for hidding, it always led him there.

And everything stopped. Released. Shen barely registered the instant the latter let him go and even stroked his cock as clue.

« Come. » Just this. No more biting pride, cruelty. Possibly masking what himself felt. Because none of them was able to resist, be it physically or emotionally.

Mind free, to hear this order even if he would have abandoned anyway. Crying out, not even aware of the debauched sight he gave in this instant. Red hair over the pillow, a few strands sticking to his damp face, a blush impossible to detect in darkness yet it burned his cheeks.

He came for a time that seemed eternal, unable to breathe, just to feel. And so he barely noticed the warmth pressed to him, broad frame trapping him down again. His body could still register the lack of stimulation, a bit empty after so long on the edge. But it was nice.

When reason came back, with the typical haze after bliss, Shen felt the latter so close to him. Literally in his arms, solid weight that kept him there. Or maybe he was the anchor. While his peak ended and rolled again and again in a beautiful memory, he welcomed Zed. Clinging to him, so far of the control displayed before.

Pure need, to hold and be held. Furiously grinding against him, hard cock leaving a wet trail over skin. Shen let him do, not fully realizing the depth of yearning there.

It sank in little by little, dizzying. _Fine ?_ So little composed, face burried against his neck. Hushed moans, almost breaking on the end. So this was the aim of the night. To seem in control, show it till he could be sure it was safe enough to break.

« Shen… »

Small, low, maybe he dreamed it.

Then Zed went still, clutching at him with all his strenght. A gasp, stuck in his throat, too trembling. It was done, he embraced climax. A few last thrusts against the latter and he sagged. Like a dead weight.

Shen didn’t really mind, still recovering from all he went through minutes ago. Breath evening, his hands still had the reflex to stay over Zed. Checking, making sure he was really here. Maybe the only moments he allowed his own weakness to show, since it was only fair. Would he always have to wait for these occasion ? To bring Shen down with him, so it didn’t seem pathetic.

_He will stay ?_ It wasn’t so often. Most of times Zed made a show of reluctance, even if he left. Most likely was that he would fall asleep here and disappear in a few hours. As long as the night was.

Silence at last. The latter didn’t move once, except to relax a little and settle back as quick. Impossible to catch a glimpse of his face, hidden. Shen gave a sad sigh. _It would be nice_.

Eyes stuck on the ceiling, embracing the one he would still call lover if it was allowed. Another one of these nights. Zed was still awake, he could tell. But not a single move. Too vulnerable instant, chances he didn’t want to point this point, break the spell.

Maybe all he asked was the safety of a moment.

Just before he felt like drifting away, Shen felt lips giving last attention. Merely a peck, that made it for all the trouble. The answer to why he still let him come here.

**Author's Note:**

> probably my last kinktober prompt for this year, unless requested :0  
hope it was still readable xD
> 
> Aaaaaaaand, you can find me on:  
> twitter: @niceswordboots  
> tumblr: https://aracdo.tumblr.com/


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